Friday, January 25, 2008

My Brain is A Flurry of Activity...For Once

Ugh. It seems like in recent months my brain likes to go on these extended vacations, leaving me to do a lot of vacant blinking and blank stares. But today? Today my mind is moving so fast that I can barely complete one thought before it's moving on to another.

My dad is going in to the hospital today to get knocked out and have a scope put down his throat and into his belly. His voice has been going through these weird changes and they're trying to figure out what's causing them. This might not sound like a huge deal, but if you knew our family history, you would understand where my mind is going right now. I couldn't hug him tight enough when we went for dinner last night.

My eyes look very blue today. Doesn't happen all that often since they are more like a grey/slate colour, but I think it has to do with the colour of my sweater. It makes me want to wear this colour more.

I was telling myself that we weren't going to have to buy that many things before Butterbean was here. But each day I think of a couple more things...the list is getting pretty long.

On days when the husband works I hate to see him come home at the end of the day. Because his back is causing him so much pain, he comes in kind of hunkered over and limping. It takes about an hour to get him to crack a smile, and even then it's kind of forced. Half the time lately I end of crying because I feel so helpless to do anything for him, then he ends of consoling me, telling me not to worry about him, just to concentrate on my health. That is so ass backwards.

I need to buy a new laundry hamper - stat! I have one that's divided up into three sections to sort everything before I go to wash it. There are two problems with that: 1. Three years after buying it, the husband STILL doesn't know what constitutes what is colour and what is white, sheesh! and 2. The stupid thing refuses to stay together - I have tried glue, rope, yelling, swearing, threatening physical harm to it - nothing works. It will give me great pleasure to throw that thing in the garbage.

I'm starting to worry a little about when I'm gone on maternity leave. I keep thinking stupid things like "Who will they hire to replace me? Will my office still be mine when I get back? What if everyone likes the new person better? What if they don't want me back?" Dumb things like that.

I'm done with winter. I am ready for skyrocketing temperatures and being drenched with sweat 10 minutes after leaving the house. This cold sucks my big toe.

That's it for now...I can't pin anything else down in my messy brain at the moment.

7 Comments:

Blogger Rock Chef said...

Hope everything is OK with your dad. That sort of thing really worries me.

I hate it when someone is ill/in pain and there is nothing you can really do to help. A bit of extra pampering would not go amiss, though, I am sure.

Well if the hamper won't stay together after you have shouted at it there is nothing else for it!

Find someone they like more than you? Surely not possible!

Roll on Spring! Yep, we are not going to get any snow, so now I want warm weather too!

Have a great weekend!

10:54 AM  
Blogger Reggie said...

Quite a treat having you blog so many times this week.

I will let you know how it feels to be all dewy in the heat after the 2nd.

Keep us posted on your father.

11:41 AM  
Blogger Laura said...

I'm sorry to hear that your dad is having some health problems, Ali. Hopefully they figure out what the problem is quickly - worry about what it might be is often worse than knowing what it is.

It's amazing how many things a tiny little baby needs, isn't it? It must be so exciting to be planning for when BB arrives!

I feel for you in the freezing Winnipeg weather. I grew up in Winnipeg and know what it's like - hell! Although temps in Ontario are a lot less extreme I'm still feeling the same way: ENOUGH ALREADY! January is an especially rough month I think. I'm glad it's almost over!

Stay warm :)

11:53 AM  
Blogger Jahooni said...

I love it when my eyes look really blue. Today they do because I am wearing grey.

I miss being pregnant. It was 7 years ago... hoping that one day it happens again.

I think we have the same clothes hamper! LOL

1:20 PM  
Blogger mr zig said...

don't worry about what will happen while you're gone - I'll make sure to hire someone we will be very thankful to get rid of - which won't be very difficult at all... we won't forget about you :)

3:02 PM  
Anonymous terri said...

I hope everything ends up ok with your dad! It's so scary when you don't know what's going on.

I am ready for spring too. Everytime I complain about the cold weather here, I think of you guys in Canada and realize it's much colder there!

6:57 PM  
Blogger Sitting in Silence said...

Hope everthing went ok with your Dad.

Keep us posted !.
Have a great weekend x

3:51 AM  

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