A couple of things you need to know to really set the scene:
1. Though I'm trying desperately not to, I sleep on my stomach, which is where I was lying at the time of this conversation.
2. I sleep in the buff.
3. The husband was laying on his back.
4. Our sheets seriously need to be changed.
Husband: Blah, blah, blah work was boring, I amputated a guys leg single-handedly, blah, blah, blah...
Ali: Oooh, wow...
*a moment of silence as we're getting comfy and beginning to relax*
Ali: What the hell!?!? (yelled at the top sheet in exasperation)
Ali: This sheet has a real attraction to my ass!
Ali: It will not stay away from my butt crack!
Ali: (laughing) We really need to change the sheets, they're too soft and lived in, so they're not laying like they're supposed to!
Husband: You think you've got problems? My ass is full of sheet!
Husband: Yeah, this bottom sheet is too loose...
Ali: (incoherent, uncontrollable, screaming laughter)
Husband: (on a roll now) Yeah! My butt is full of fabric!
Ali: Oh my god!! (more laughter) What? (more laughter) Oh my god, stop talking!!!! I can't take it!!!!
This laughter went on so long, and I laughed so hard that it actually turned into a big, giant, sobbing, bawl-fest. It was that funny.
And...as you may have realized, I'm not big on the "changing the sheets every week" idea. Not that I wouldn't love to, but I'm lazy. Needless to say, the sheets have been changed.