Monday, April 28, 2008

I Could Really Use a Sex Dream About Now...

Oh Lord. The dreams. They have been so vivid, so complex, so intricate, that when I wake up I'm usually out of breath and thinking they're real.
And no, I'm not talking about sex dreams - but damn do I wish I was!
Over the past 3 or 4 nights I've been pummeled with these dreams. About the baby, some of you, some people from work, things from my high school days - the weirdest combos. Of course, some of the details have faded from my mind by the time I catch my breath again, but I figured I'd share a couple with you:

Last Night:
I dreamed of Reggie, Gigi, the Bean, and myself. Only, the Bean was actually their baby, and Gigi kept having to leave to buy jewelery and horses, so I was pretty much taking care of the baby.
They lived on a massive cartoon ranch in the middle of who knows where. It was cartoony, like nature is sometimes portrayed in really bad movies: the trees are all alive, the flowers and sun are greeting everyone, everything is bright, primary colours, and there is singing going on all over the the flowers, birds, sun, trees, animals, etc. They were singing some gay-ass song about it being a wonderful day - I wanted to tell them to shut up, but Reggie and Gigi seemed to love it.
Anyways, I was walking across this field when I saw this huge acreage with a moat around it - imagine my surprise when Gigi came prancing up beside me on a beautiful horse to tell me she'd been waiting for me for hours! So I climbed on the back of the horse, and we flew over the moat. Yes, flew.
We landed gracefully beside the barn where Reggie was dressed in jean overalls, and he told me the baby was sleeping in the barn, so I could go get them and come in the house for lunch. Then Gigi had to literally see a man about a horse, and then was going to a jewelery expo in town and would be back later.
I spent the day helping Reggie move hay from one pile to another, watching the baby, and sidestepping the 103 horses that were walking everywhere. And yes, there were 103 horses, I asked Reggie.
I woke up panicked because I lost their baby in one of the haystacks...

Saturday Night:
Many of the details of this dream are vague up until the end.
I was still at work, but work was somehow located in my old high school in Ontario. I dreamed that there was an earthquake, and I somehow ended up in the principal's office trying to hide from the tremors, along with one of the women I work with. For some reason we got locked in the office and I started having contractions, but my water would not break.
The woman I was with had me lie down on the floor and checked to see what was going on down there - apparently I have no problem showing people my hoohoo in dreams - nice.
Anyways, she determined that the only thing to do was to break my water (how she knew this I have no idea, she's a sales manager!) and started looking around the office for something to do it with.
Seeing the determined look in her eye I started to panic, telling her I didn't think it was a good idea, and that maybe we should just wait to be rescued!
She reached up onto the desk, grabbed a pen (which just happened to be the naked man pen that Krista brought me from Amsterdam a couple years ago - lol), looked me dead in the eye and said "trust me". Then she pressed the button on the end of the pen to make the little inky part come out - like that extra two millimeters was going to make a difference - and poked me in the crotch while I started screaming!
Just as I heard this loud gush I woke up, screaming of course, and had to feel the bed to make sure it hadn't really happened!
That was traumatizing. Holy shit.

I have no idea what either of those dreams mean, but I think I'm starting to sub-consciously worry about labour, and perhaps what kind of mother I'll be.

I vaguely remember waking the husband up last night just to ask him if he thought I'd be a good mom, then going back to sleep when he told me I'd be the best mom ever...hmmm.


Blogger Sitting in Silence said...

Hormones Ali....either that or you gotta lay off the diet soda...LMAO

10:12 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think you interpreted your dreams well. I think it is really normal to have the dreams you have. As SIS said, It's the hormones but I also believe it is the tiny amount of doubt that you have about being ready for the birth and the baby.
All normal!
Luv'N'Hugs, Lesley

11:05 PM  
Blogger Rock Chef said...

Wow, they were even stranger than some of MY dreams!

I think worrying about when and where (or if!) you waters will break is common - Clare certainly got paranoid about it although in the end she had to have them broken every single time!

And Chris is right - you will be an awesome mom!

3:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh Ali, I LOVE Brothers and Sisters. It's one of my favs...
Also Dirty Sexy Money and All Saints.. Oh and a few more, they just finish too quickly.
Hope your having a good evening.
Hugs, Lesley

3:56 AM  
Blogger Reggie said... accurate in many ways.

I used to love those cartoons that everything sang those gay ass tunes.

Jewelery, yes. Horses, 2. Gay ass trees, a few.

Right now it is 5:48 AM and a hoot owl is going at it and it making the dogs bark.

This is all too funny.

4:50 AM  
Anonymous terri said...

I had a run for a while there where the dreams I could actually remember were sex dreams. And they didn't involve my hubby, so I woke up feeling guilty. Trust me, you're better off with the gay-ass trees, songs and flying horses.

7:36 AM  
Blogger Logziella said...

Pregnancy dreams are the worst!! They are always so stinking vivid and WEIRD!! Loved that one about Reggie and Gigi though! And an INK PEN???? gosh...that's aweful!!! LOL!!

3:19 PM  
Blogger Jahooni said...

i miss those. you are fretting about them now, but you'll soon miss them. ;)~

12:20 AM  

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