Monday, July 23, 2007

Let's Get Physical, Physical

It's Monday. I'm back in the city. And I...am wiped out.
Oh man, it was another weekend of hard labour at my parent's house and I loved every minute of it.
Bright and early Saturday morning my brother and I went out into the backyard, armed with a stereo, hammers, a pry bar, and way too much excitement to demolish his tree fort. I say 'way too much' because we were actually giddy at the prospect of smashing stuff.
Oh, but before I go on - I have to tell you about this weekend's demo outfit - it was just gorgeous.
Thursday I washed all the clothes we were going to be bringing home. I made a mental note to grab all my tank tops because I knew it was going to be hot, plus, when you're sweating that much it's nice to have on as little clothing as possible, provided it's safe.
So, Saturday morning I pull on a pair of shorts, reach for a tank top - and shit! I forgot them all at home. Grrrrr. My brother weighs like 100 lbs soaking wet (and doesn't have boobs), my dad doesn't own a muscle shirt, and anything my mom had would have been too big on me. So - what's a girl to do?
Well, this girl grabbed one of her brother's t-shirts that miraculously fit, pulled it on, grabbed a pair of scissors, then asked aforementioned brother to have at the shirt. I told him to cut the sleeves off, cut the neck out, and cut as far down the back as he could, while leaving enough fabric to cover my bra. You should have seen us, it took 15 minutes of us laughing, him stabbing me, and me finally ripping half the shirt to get the "desired" effect. Then I pulled my hair up on my head, put on my sunglasses, and pulled on a pair of old shoes to protect my feet. It was spectacular, let me tell you. My mom was appalled when she saw the finished product.

So, to the backyard we went, cranked the Fratellis, and started smashing away at the tree fort. The first wall was down within 5 minutes, and came down on my leg. So I'm standing there spouting expletives and my brother is on his knees in the fort, laughing at my pain.
I whipped up my leg and kicked him in the shoulder.
He quit laughing and I started.
Oh the joys of sibling relationships.
A few minutes later we both calmed down and got back to the demolition. We ripped the deck off next and began dragging it over to where my dad deemed the official "mess zone". Halfway there we decided that it was too heavy, so we threw it on the ground and both jumped up on it. Next thing you know we were calling it our "dance off stage" and were both dancing around like crazy people. Soon my dad started yelling from the front yard that we looked like idiots and that people were going to think there was something wrong with us. He was kidding of course, and that just made us dance even harder.
Anyways, an hour later the tree fort was in a shambles around us and we went in to get a drink. Next thing you know my brother is playing Guitar Hero (the husband brought it down for him to try) and he decided that he was done helping for the day. Sigh.
The rest of the day was a blur - my dad ended up coming outside to help me, but my brother, the husband, and a couple of his friends went to the beach for the day. They asked me to go, but I was having too much fun destroying things. I know the husband was annoyed that I didn't go, but I don't think he understands first off how much I love to do this kind of hard work, and second, how much I love to hang out with my dad. Hard work and good company is a great day in my books.
So they went to the beach and I began destroying the rest of the backyard.

Once the fort was ripped down and thrown into a pile we started cutting down the dead trees and branches that line the property. Next we ripped out the old swingset - this was not an easy feat, as my dad had cemented the poles 2 feet into the ground to avoid it ever flipping when we were playing on it. So he shoveled all the way around each post, I would start hanging on the poles to try to get them started, then use the pry bar to loosen the suction of dirt, then grab on again and hang there until they eventually gave way.
Then I started talking about this wild rose bush that grows in the backyard. When I was younger it was just one little bush, but it's slowly taken over part of the yard. There are these thorned branches everywhere you step and they hurt.
My dad grabbed the power saw and I grabbed the axe and we went nuts cutting down all the crazy rose bushes.
Then my dad started talking about moving the shed. This was supposed to be a project for later on in the summer. But I had my dad on a roll and we decided to move it then too. So we yanked everything out of the shed, unhooked it from the base, and dragged it off. Then I demolished the old base.
This entire process took us about 7.5 hours of hard labour. And I mean hard. I drank about 15 bottles of water, some lemonade, a pop, 2 glasses of milk and half a bottle of wine at supper and I was still dying of thirst.
My poor legs look like someone dragged me out to the back 40 and shit-kicked me without me putting up a fight. My left shin has got a nice bruise where the wall of the fort fell on it and I have scratches all over from walking through thorny rose bushes and dragging trees around the yard.
Oh, and then while my dad was making supper I decided to go through the rhubarb patch and get rid of all the overgrown stuff - it will just make for sweeter stalks when it grows in again.
Um, yeah, it must have been years since someone did that. I was wearing my brothers size 11 sandals...take a look at the size difference. Whoa.

All in all it was a fantabulous weekend - and in spite of the aching back today, I can't complain. Hope you all had a great weekend too.

2 Comments:

Blogger 2xA+r0n said...

Rockin' the homemade wife-beater! You know it was good if your Mom was appauled!

6:33 AM  
Blogger Reggie said...

You should start a Wilma Flintstone line of clothing.

I love the high tech graphics.

6:52 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home