Sexy Hair? I Wish...
You know the kind I'm talking about - that tousled, soft, touch me, voluminous head of locks that has men and women alike stopping in their tracks going "Oooooooh!"
The kind where I should be walking in slow motion with a sultry grin on my face, my hair gleaming and bouncing in the sunshine.
The kind where photographers are following me around, shooting frame after frame of me as I twist and turn, always with this knowing smile on my face that says "I've got great hair, you know you want it..."
Yeah, that's the kind of hair I want.
Yesterday the husband and I talked about this. I was telling him how after I shower every morning I twist my hair up into a towel while I put on some makeup and brush my teeth. Then just before I leave the bathroom, I untwist the towel and shake my hair down my back. And you know what? It looks hot. Every freaking time.
I'm always thinking "Damn my hair looks hot! I'm just going to leave it like this today!"
Sadly, that never goes according to plan. In fact, within 20 minutes of exiting the bathroom feeling like a true sexpot, you can be sure I look anything but sexy. It seems that the moment my hair is kissed by outside air (and that's just outside the bathroom, not even outside the house) it turns into a frizzy, fluffy, deflated, ridiculous mess.
Suddenly there are these horns of hair sticking out at odd angles. Suddenly the natural curl seems to fall from my tendrils. Suddenly it looks like someone backcombed just the top of my head. Suddenly? Sexy hair does not inhabit my home.
I've tried products, tried leaving it alone, tried curling it, straightening it, perming it (when perms were cool), and sadly I've just come to the realization that I'll never have that perfect, sexy hair.
And the funny thing about it? The really ridiculous part? The days I get the most compliments on my hair are the days when I don't even brush it. Go figure.