Sunday, July 19, 2009

Sexy Hair? I Wish...

I don't know about any other women, but I'm always wishing I had sexier hair.

You know the kind I'm talking about - that tousled, soft, touch me, voluminous head of locks that has men and women alike stopping in their tracks going "Oooooooh!"

The kind where I should be walking in slow motion with a sultry grin on my face, my hair gleaming and bouncing in the sunshine.

The kind where photographers are following me around, shooting frame after frame of me as I twist and turn, always with this knowing smile on my face that says "I've got great hair, you know you want it..."

Yeah, that's the kind of hair I want.

Yesterday the husband and I talked about this. I was telling him how after I shower every morning I twist my hair up into a towel while I put on some makeup and brush my teeth. Then just before I leave the bathroom, I untwist the towel and shake my hair down my back. And you know what? It looks hot. Every freaking time.

I'm always thinking "Damn my hair looks hot! I'm just going to leave it like this today!"

Sadly, that never goes according to plan. In fact, within 20 minutes of exiting the bathroom feeling like a true sexpot, you can be sure I look anything but sexy. It seems that the moment my hair is kissed by outside air (and that's just outside the bathroom, not even outside the house) it turns into a frizzy, fluffy, deflated, ridiculous mess.

Suddenly there are these horns of hair sticking out at odd angles. Suddenly the natural curl seems to fall from my tendrils. Suddenly it looks like someone backcombed just the top of my head. Suddenly? Sexy hair does not inhabit my home.

I've tried products, tried leaving it alone, tried curling it, straightening it, perming it (when perms were cool), and sadly I've just come to the realization that I'll never have that perfect, sexy hair.

And the funny thing about it? The really ridiculous part? The days I get the most compliments on my hair are the days when I don't even brush it. Go figure.

9 Comments:

Blogger Rock Chef said...

I think it is a law of life - no woman ever likes here hair! Given what you have said I think your hair already knows how to look hot,but your fussing around ruins it. Just go with the slightly wild "too busy being hot to spend time on my hair" look.

3:22 AM  
Blogger James said...

Brylcreem

10:47 AM  
Blogger Michele said...

I feel for you, because I know just what you are talking about! When I turned 40 (only 13 months ago) I decided to quit fussing with it. I told my haircut lady that I no longer wanted to curl, straighten, fluff, cover in assorted products... I was DONE! She gave me a cut that is mostly OK, but I do still get a little devil horn right at my left temple that I have to curl into submission.
I don't have superstar sexy hair, BUT I don't have split ends or an hour long regime anymore either!
Yeah, it won, but not without loosing many battles!
Best of luck to you!

2:36 PM  
Blogger terri said...

Rock Chef is right. Those that have curly hair want it straight. Those that have straight hair want curls. It's too thick, too thin, not the right color, grows too slow...

Let's start a movement and just shave our heads!

6:41 PM  
Blogger Rock Chef said...

This inspired my latest post...

4:00 AM  
Blogger Slyde said...

my wife swears that as soon as she goes outside, her hair looks like shit.

it looks the exact same to me, so i dont know what the hell you chicks fret about..

9:40 AM  
Blogger The Peach Tart said...

I'm with you. I tried to beat it into submission. I use taming products, I use curling irons, I use flat irons. As soon as I hit the Atlanta humidity, I look like Rosanna Rosaana Dana

5:24 PM  
Blogger Kyla Roma said...

Gah, I totally hear you. Hence why my new haircut is something I relentlessly iron into place and then walk away from lol

3:20 PM  
Blogger Sitting In Silence said...

Yes LOL...The touch me hair...I so have to buy a wig...I just have too !

8:59 PM  

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