Just Use the Dirty Words Already!
I used to be a reader, but in recent years have had a hard time fitting any extra reading into my life. One of the reasons for that is that usually when I pick up a book I can't set it down. I have very little willpower in that regard.
Over Christmas I spent a lot of time at Monica's parents house, and decided to borrow some of her mom's books. I just wanted something easy to read, that I could pick up and put down without much effort, and therefore ended up with a stack of mostly trashy/romance type stuff. I've been reading them at a rate of about a book a day. I play with Ellery when she's awake, but the reading could be the reason my house in such a particularly hideous state of disarray.
Is it possible for me to just say what I want to say without a 10 paragraph long precursor? I think not. Holy.
Anyways, as I was saying, I now have a huge stack of easy-to-read smut books, that I am whipping through at breakneck speed.
Wow, that was way easier than writing all that other junk up above...
Okay, right! So yeah, I've made an annoying discovery in these books when there is some sort of sex scene going on.
For some reason, these authors like to use the word "sex" as a sexy substitute for the words penis or vagina.
For example: Just when Helga and Brutus' heavy make-out session is going to turn into some passionate lovemaking, the author will write a couple lines like: Helga was overcome with lust for Brutus. As he expertly danced his fingers down her naked stomach towards her sex, he could feel his own sex busting to get out of his trousers.
Yeah. That's about as sexy as getting your yearly physical done by your pervy uncle.
I realize "penis" and "vagina" don't come across as very sexy either, but come on! Anyone reading this trash knows damn well there's going to be sex scenes, so just use the dirty words already!