Monday, April 02, 2007

The Art of the Pout

As any true girl knows - sometimes a good pout can go a long way.

Now I'm not encouraging you to pout whenever you don't get your way, but as someone that knows how to throw a good pout around when she needs it - I find it highly effective.
I have yet to meet a man that can resist a really good pout. The husband, my dad, my little brother, co-workers...all susceptible to the cute poutiness of a girl. Whether she is 6 months or 90 years old, females have been blessed with this amazing gift - why not use it?

Now ladies, there are a few ground rules when it comes to pouting - in fact, it's somewhat of an art form. You can't just half-assed throw on a pout and expect to get your way - there is a sort of finesse to the whole thing.

Myself, I have found several tried and true methods that seem to always attain the desired result. For instance: your significant other decides that you need to hit Home Dep.ot before you go out for your anniversary dinner, or a co-worker suggests that you go to McDonald's (yuck) for lunch for the fourth time this week. The idea is to spring into action when the man is not looking directly at you. While he's distracted with getting his coat, inch your bottom lip out ever so slightly, while lowering your eyes in a sulky, childlike fashion. The next time they glance your way it is almost guaranteed that they will stop mid-sentence, and their mouth will open slightly, then they'll say "Oh no, don't start with that pout..." at which point ladies, you make your move.
Slowly raise your eyes up just a little, and furrow your brow just enough to make you look like you could either be throwing in the towel and surrendering in defeated silence or on the verge of tears. And that is when the man will say "Oh fine, geez, we can do it your way then..."
Sometimes the pout is not quite as effective as one would hope, and so requires some extra fanagling to get the desired effect. I have been known to throw in a low, soft "Awwwwwwww" - other times require a slightly more forceful "Hrmph!" - but occasionally I have been faced with having to do the "Well I never..." followed by a dramatic arm crossing.

As I said before - I have yet to find the man that can resist any or all of these tried and tested techniques - unless maybe he was a gay man...which is fine too, although, this entire lesson is useless in that respect.


Blogger Princess of the Universe said...

Do you give classes? I think you should be my new life coach!
I think your next lesson should be on the art of hair tossing- or maybe eyelash fluttering! :P

7:37 PM  
Blogger Rick said...

Hair tossing works for me!

9:38 PM  
Blogger mr zig said...

Hm... this blog seems sort of like a challange to resist the pout. I think starting today I will no longer be affected by pouts! mwuahaha

7:24 AM  
Blogger Terri said...

I love the pout! I'm the queen of pouting around these parts! It's very effective when arguing with the hubby too. Pout a little and he'll be the first to apologize!

6:19 PM  
Blogger John said...

Maybe this could inspire a new section in beauty pageants - swinsuit, evening dress, talent, my one wish (always World Peace, according to Miss Congeniality), getting own way!

6:20 AM  

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